You're Creepy, Hunter

The other night I got called creepy and I really wish I had had a voice recorder on me.  Because I didn't and have no idea what exactly was said, this is a dramatization.

The other night my friend invites me out.  My link to her group is shaky because I hook up with one of their friends and proceed to hit on, while drunk and via text, another one later on. 

Via Text calls me outright creepy, so I begin following her asking her why I am creepy- my actions a self-replicating definition of the word. 

I talk to her through the bathroom door.

"Why am I creepy?"
"Oh my god, are you seriously outside of the bathroom?"

I follow her outside.

"Why am I creepy?" a hint of hurt in my voice.  Who wants to be creepy?
She turns and scowls, says, "You want to know why you're creepy?"  She gets all close staring at me, then breaks and says to follow her.
"Yeah, let's talk over there," I agree, not wanting to be outed as a creepy person in front of presumably non-creepy people.

We sit next to each other on narrow, warped stairs.  Moonlight and bulbs bear down.  I think, this is creepy.  She says I text her when I'm drunk and ask her to hang out, which never happens.  I figure this is more "unreliable" than anything else but she continues to berate my character. 

I feel this is unfair.  I must now get back at her by actually being creepy to her, openly, in front of everyone.

At one point I have the guy next to me looking all physically uncomfortable or offended at what I'm saying.  He is in the middle of introducing himself(and thusly hitting on her) when I interrupt, telling him this girl is bad news, that she broke my heart, had my abortion.  All of which, except maybe the first one, are untrue.  Out loud I imagine how our relationship ended.  I pass this as truth like a delusional person.  Whatever I say at this moment makes the guy uncomfortable.  Via just stands there and shakes her head. 

The guy trying to hit on her attempts to make fun of me.  This is impossible.  I am so imperviously in creepy character that everything he says turns into another offensive and sketchy joke about my faux-love for this girl.  
 
I start harassing Via about going out for coffee.  She says she leaves in a week for good.  I repeat, "and it won't go anywhere, so just come out for coffee with me.  We can make it reeeeal public."  Someone suggests I should try to play with her hair.
"What's the point?" her eyes ask the same thing.

Some time passes. 

I try to reclaim sunglasses I left at my friend's house months ago.  She says they look better on her.  They do.  I am no longer upset about losing them.  I now feel bad for blaming my roommate for losing/breaking/selling them/whatever.  My friend has awesome hair and jumps on my back for a totally one-sided chicken fight. 

Some time passes and the group turns against me.  I hurry to unlock my bike and leave.  Via says something like Take Your Creeper Ass Somewhere Else or You're Insane or whatever.  I don't remember.  As I am riding away-- and I remember this-- she says, "For the record, I don't really think you're creepy."

I say, "Whatever, you are!" and nearly crash my bike into a trashcan.